I filled about 3 pages of notes at 3am this morning. This has been pretty common occurrence over the past few months.
Just before 3am, my thoughts went something like this:
“Should have emailed clientStill need to pack summers clothes awayAm I keeping that little summer dress with the white frillsI hope Luke is okayDid we ever pay the Telkom billI should check if the geyser in the flat is offI need to email the Muizenberg tenant tomorrowI really should phone my mom again on our landlineI hope Lulu will find more workI love our fireplaceSo exited about sailingI love our room and bedI have a peeShould I blog or notWhy do we have so much stuffSo excited to have less stuffI want to paint moreI want to share my thoughtsI want to get that new blanket for the boatWonder when the weather will be okay to sail across toHow much fun was it to bump into PauWe need to still fill all the holes where we had our paintingsI love James DeanI loved my black and white printsOur kitchen is lekkerI need to still clean the pantryThe galley is small on the boatI want to cook all sorts of stuff on the I have a peeWhere is the charger for my iPadWonder who will take the tumble dryerI need to clean the fireplaceNeed to sort a better admin system out once we are on PlutoI hope that new website proposal gets acceptedWhen will I get time to do the new designsI miss ClaireWhy do we still not have the plansI should phone Charles tomorrowSo happy to build websitesNeed to finish that youtube clipThe park is getting a new play areaKyle would have loved itWe need to remember to clean the vent in the bathroomNeed to organize John for next week to help clean up before we hand over keysWe need to check all the guttersThe lemons are still amazingStill need to sell the tableSo looking forward to have fewer house adminI grew tomatoesStill not sure when to post my videosEarly morning recording is goodShould I post my videosIt is so personalI don’t mind getting personalI have a pee”
After a few hours of this endless lists of things to do running and random gibberish on my mind (far from counting a line up of sheep – it was more like Noahs Ark was let loose on Tequila), I got up.
What I have learned from my “always on a deadline” career is to either get up and get it done, or write it down. The trick works wonders in calming the brain and is a sure fire way to get it to shut off. I scribbled down in some order and systematic approach, what needed to be done over the next few days. First, list the to-do’s per day and then neatly categorized per category (house, boat, admin, work) and then per day. Three FULL pages later I returned to bed. Satisfied brain intact.
So today, at the crack of sparrows’ we started and we got it done. Yeah.
But we still have stuff. How is that possible?
It feels like this move is taking FOREVER. A week from today IS THE DAY. We will be handing over keys. So we had a little pre-sundowners sundowner, on our roof and looked at our beautiful garden. We sighed. We love it but SO HAPPY TO MOVE ON.
As absolutely frightening as this decision of us selling up might have come to some, it is actually not at all. Which is frightening in itself, I suppose. We definitely have our ups and downs, highs and lows. And sometimes we are sad BUT mostly very excited. What is frightening is how much stuff there is to do to have less stuff.
PLEASE DON’T get me WRONG.
This is far from a complain. If you have ever taken a decision in your life that you KNOW IS RIGHT, it does not mean it will be easy, or without tears. I have NEVER doubted this next move for more than a second : )
Overall just want to remind my future self of how I feel today.